Before I Burst Into Tears

It's not often that I write a blog back to back.
But I just feel like I have to.

I don't know why I let meaningless guys get in my way.

I think I'm alright. I think I'm fine.

But then I make the mistake of sleeping with him again.
And I convince myself that I can be just friends.
He always says something that hurts me.
"Are you 'the one' that I was supposed to eat pastries with?" (no, I'm not.)
"Guess I gotta get a date book." (for what? to keep your girls in check?)

*click on Facebook* He's friends with some Misty girl. *click on his page* Misty: "Oh hey, stranger. Haven't spoken to you in a while. ;D" Him: "Pshh, I talked to you last week." (oh, did you? the week you were ignoring me?)


I don't want to be just a girl that lays in his bed and he forgets when I leave.
I'm totally in love with him and I try to hide it.


And the thing is; he'll never care.
He'll never feel the same.
I'm nothing.

I never was anything to him anyway.
So I don't know why I'm so hurt by it.



Maybe all I'm worth is just sex to him.
The price I pay him for my bad habits.


And when I'm gone...when he's settled down...will he ever even remember who I was and why I ever came around?





Probably not.


Imma go be depressed now.